Published: May 20, 2008 10:03 am         

Argus Hamilton for 05-20

HOLLYWOOD—God bless America, and how’s everybody?

Hillary Clinton lauded Ted Kennedy Saturday although he backs Obama. She bears no grudges. No one wants to say she has a voodoo doll but after Ted Kennedy went to the hospital, Ken Starr slept without back pain for the first time since Whitewater.

New England coach Bill Belichick lashed out at cheating accusations against him on the CBS Evening News Friday. Everyone in football knows he runs a loose ship. Bill Belichick has a lifetime offer from USC to be the school’s director of NCAA compliance.

Albert Einstein’s letter to a philosopher was auctioned Friday for four hundred thousand dollars. He’s the most famous scientist ever. His theory of relativity demonstrated that once you become successful, your relatives come out of the woodwork.

Argus Hamilton is the host comedian at The Comedy Store in Hollywood. He can be reached for speaking engagements by e-mail at argus@argushamilton.com.